Sunday, 2 October 2011

Mr Bumpy: "I Am Not On A Power Trip"

I'm not a bad cat, just misunderstood.

Hello in the Bloggosphere,

Yes, I am back. Last week's little incident won't happen again, mostly because Woof is now kept permanently bound and gagged, and will not be allowed near the computer. Woof is not very bright, as you may have noticed from reading his Cat-it-orial, but let me assure you he is harmless.

The rats have been appropriately punished for the "while the cat's away the rats will play" attitude.

Now that I'm back at my editor's desk, I need to clear the air about some things.

There is a rumour going around (and I think it began with tweets from the bird cage, but I can't prove it) that I am some kind of megalomaniac.  Nothing could be further from the truth.

I am a simple, loving, caring cat.  I only expect my employees will work to a standard which shows that they care as much for the outcome as I do. That's not a lot to expect, is it?  After all, we're only producing a blog here at Not To Be Taken Seriously, not invading Poland, how hard can their work be?

I don't expect any of my staff to risk their lives in serving me, although if the situation arose, hmmm, I wonder how the situation could arise?

I don't unfairly restrain or torture my staff. The cages, chains, etc are for their own protection. (Mostly, they're to protect them from me, but that's beside the point.)

No, don't believe anything you might hear. I am not on some mad, power trip. I am just a humble, simple cat.

Until next time we meet in the Bloggosphere,
I am
Mr Bumpy
Chief Executive Officer of Not To Be Taken Seriously
Lord and Master
Prime Minister
Supreme Ruler of the Universe

.... Ah, excuse me everyone.  Bumpy's just off for a little trip to the vet's now. Don't worry, we got the duct tape off Woof, and only had to cut off a bit of his hair to do it.  There'll be a new joke on the blog tomorrow, whether Bumpy's home again or sedated at the vet's.  Have a great week, and send us plenty of jokes at Regards, Rupert and the Rat Collective.

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