Friday, 6 January 2012

Christmas Gift Consequences!

Hello out there in the Bloggosphere,

There's been some unusual goings-on, on-going since Christmas in the NTBTS household.....

Joseph appears to have lost his head!
However could that have happened?

Humans ought to know that their actions have consequences. It's something they're supposed to learn. Unlike cats who are able to do anything they want and everyone is always happy with that, humans' actions can have negative effects on very important animals.

So, no-one should have been surprised that "accidents" would happen around the house, after they saw my Christmas present.  (No, not the lovely dead mouse I left under the tree - which Mum threw out. I mean the present for me.)

It's all Mum's fault.  She bought a generic "cat present" - she also bought a generic "dog present" which was just as bad, but that doesn't really matter.

These presents were big, brightly-coloured pre-packed bonbons. One had a picture of a cat on it and one had a picture of a dog on it. They didn't have any delicious smells coming out of them, like my usual presents do, but I was hopeful.

Christmas day came, and we didn't get to open our presents until the guests arrived. My present had been under the tree for weeks! And I still didn't get to open it.

Then when I did, it was a ball! It wasn't an exciting jingle ball that would make noises and skitter around the floor while I chased it.  It wasn't a soft catnip ball I could bat around with my paws and have the occasional chew on. It was a slightly-undersized-tennis-ball. I decided it was a mistake and went to steal, I mean acquire, Mr Woof's present. His was also a slightly-undersized-tennis-ball. Mr Woof is not impressed with tennis balls either - he was hoping for a pig's ear.

Well, of course, we both got ham and turkey and quiche for Christmas dinner. And Mr Woof forgave the humans for his pathetic present.

But me? I ate their Christmas food, of course, but I really can't just forgive an insult like that, can I? What would happen next year, if I let them get away with that?

So "things" have been happening around here.  The first "thing" happened on boxing day.  There was this cheese knife Mum's friend gave her last Christmas.  It's a cutsie little thing with a ceramic Christmas tree with a yellow star on top. Or it, er, used to have a yellow star at top. The star somehow broke off. Nobody saw it happen. There's nobody to blame. It just happened, somehow.

And then, just before Epiphany (because all the Christmas stuff gets put away at Epiphany), Joseph from the nativity scene lost his head. I have a theory about how this happened: if all you did for weeks and weeks was to stand looking at a ceramic baby that wasn't doing anything and wasn't made of catnip, maybe you'd get bored and go for a walk or something. And maybe if you were on a high table, you might fall off when you went for a walk. And maybe if you were made of something really breakable, your head would come off. Well, that's my theory of what happened.

There's no need to blame any cat in particular. No need to place blame at all.  Things just happen, don't they?  Especially if you've given your cat a really bad Christmas present.

I hope all your presents were good ones.

If anyone got more jingle balls than they wanted, please send me some.

Until next time we meet in the bloggosphere,
I remain,
yours faithfully
Mr Bumpy

1 comment:

  1. Thanks to the wonder of Areldite, both Joseph and the cheese-knife have been repaired. Hopefully, the glue can cure with no further "accidents" happening, so I can put both away for the year.


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