Monday, 1 October 2012

The Great Friskies Caper

Rupert Rat - doesn't he look guilty?
Hello out there in the Bloggosphere,

I have to report a heinous crime - the kidnapping, or or theft or misappropriation or something - of three of my Friskies.

I can practically hear you gasp at the horror of it.  I still feel a little faint myself, talking about it.  The worst part of this is that I was betrayed, not only by the Rat Collective (because I expect them to be underhanded and generally objectionable), but also by Mum! 

Believe it or not, Mum was part of the crime of the century!

Oh, I know, I'm not making any sense at the moment, but I'm just so distressed.

So here's the story from the start.

The Rat Collective's cage has been moved.  (Yes, they live in a cage, I'd never get any work out of them if they were free to wander off wherever they wanted. I'm a very sensible employer.)

The whole Rat Collective, sleeping on the job.
Front to back: Montgomery, Chester and Rupert.
They used to be fairly well out of my way, but now they're right where everyone walks past them constantly.  And they're taking advantage of it.  Every time they see a human, they beg for a treat.

Mum always gives in.  Usually she gives them a peanut or a pumpkin seed. Once she gave them some squashed strawberries, Rupert and Chester ate theirs, and Montgomery rolled on his. Mum was very apologetic as Miss 21 pulled Monty out of the cage to wash him.

So Mum now only gives them things that won't make Montgomery sticky.

Now, we get to the horrible crime.  Mum was walking past with a box of my Friskies, and the whole Rat Collective were doing their begging act - and she gave them each one of my Friskies! Rats ate three of my Friskies! Can you believe it?

Oh dear, I'm so traumatised,  I need to go for a nap.

Until next time we meet in the Bloggosphere,
I remain,
Mr Bumpy,
Supreme Feline Overlord.


Can you keep a secret?

Don't tell Bumps, because you know how he gets.  

When Bumpy's not looking Mr Woof sneaks Friskies straight out of his bowl.   

But it's our secret. If Bumps knew, he'd be horrible to poor old Woof, and would probably hurt him.

Rupert Rat,
And The Rat Collective.

1 comment:

  1. I'm totally upset and horrified ! To share your Friskies with another cat could exceptionnally be accepted, but with non feline creatures it's a Federal Crime. Loupi on Mum's account


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