Saturday, 23 March 2013

The Art of Napping

"Naps on a stolen bed, such as Mr Woof's,
are always good." - Mr Bumpy.
Hello out there in the Bloggosphere,

It's Caturday, so I thought I'd give you a break from all the politics, and do something to relax.

Let's talk naps.

Cats need numerous naps throughout the day. Every one of them is important.

Firstly, there are meal-time-based naps:

  • The pre-breakfast nap, is the one that sets the cat up for the day. If it's a good nap, it's going to be a good day.
  • The post-breakfast-pre-morning tea nap is also very important, as it helps digest breakfast, and lulls the dog into a false sense of security thinking he's safe from attack.
  • Then there's the post-morning-tea-pre-lunch nap.  I can't possibly miss that one. 
  • Of course the post-lunch-pre-afternoon-tea nap is vital.
  • And there's the post-after-noon-tea-pre-dinner-nap.
  • Then the post-dinner-pre-bed-time nap.
Humans, being human and therefore not very bright, think those are enough naps, and don't believe it's possible to fit any more in a day at all.  That's not true.

After the meal-time-based naps, a cat has to have all the positional naps.
  • There's the in-the-hallway-so-everyone-trips-over-you nap. That's always amusing.
  • Stolen-bed naps, such as naps on Mr Woof's beds, are always very pleasurable, especially if the owner of the bed actually wanted it.
  • The stretched-right-across-the-human's-bed nap is very good as well.
  • Of course the curled-up-on-the-human nap is vital for keeping humans aware of who is in charge.
  • There must be at least one outside (my fortress counts as outside) nap in a day, preferably two or three.
  • And the unexpected-place nap is often quite effective.  It's always entertaining to see the humans' reactions when they open a cupboard and a cat suddenly wakes and jumps at them.
  • I also enjoy the how-does-he-do-that nap, lying in entirely improbable positions, or hanging halfway off something. 
  • I'm not so keen on the snore-snore-thunk nap, where I slide off the bed or whatever I'm on and land unceremoniously on the floor.
  • And there's the I-hope-you-feel-guilty nap, taken in front of an empty food bowl.  This doesn't seem to have the desired effect for me as Mum just says, "Well, you'll have to talk to whoever ate the Friskies." 
  • I love the inconvenience-the-human nap, where, when a human gets up for a drink or whatever, I dive into the just-vacated seat and fall asleep before the human returns to reclaim it.
  • I mustn't forget to mention the look-I'm-a-human nap. This requires getting under the covers on the human's bed and sleeping with just my head on the pillow.
Well, that's about it for me.  I must go and have my all-important 67th nap of the day.  I think it will be an in-the-laundry-basket nap. Enjoy your Caturday everyone.

Until next time we meet in the Bloggosphere,
I remain,

Mr Bumpy,
Supreme Feline Overlord,
Feline Pawty Prime Minispurrial Candidate.


  1. I totally agree with you : every nap prepares the next one, so every single nap is important. Disturbing a cat during his nap should be considered as a federal crime (Zorro, read it and learn !!). Loupi on Mum's account

  2. After my dinner nap I do the zoomies for an hour and have trained huMum that this is the time she must play with me! xxx's


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