|Tiger 'Dude' McClygus,|
Feline Pawty candidate for Ryan.
Thank you Mr Bumpy for appointing me the Feline Pawty candidate for Ryan.
I have some radical policies which I think you will agree will improve life for all Australians. Firstly, no human will be allowed to eat any meat product in the vicinity of a cat without sharing it. That applies to everything. Bacon, chicken, beef, and tuna. Especially tuna. Secondly, all humans will be obliged to devote their attention to their feline friends whenever it is desired.
I have implemented both of these policies within my own household to great benefit. The humans under my care are now well trained and happier for it. But I recognise that not all cats have the firm meow required to enforce household rules. That's why we need to rewrite the laws for the benefit of all catkind!
With purrs and headrubs,
Tiger 'Dude' McClygus