Wednesday, 4 September 2013

If Anyone Wants Me, I'll Be With My Jingle Ball

"I've decided to be an olympic jingle ball player
instead." - Mr Bumpy.
Hello out there in the Bloggosphere,

I was sick of politics anyway.

Apparently I can't run for parliament.

I filled in my form and went to the Australian Electoral Commission.

They said I couldn't nominate for the election because I wasn't on the electoral roll.

Then they said I couldn't register the Feline Pawty because it didn't have enough members who were on the electoral roll.

I asked if I could be on the electoral roll.

They asked if I was over 18 years old.

I said no, I'm only seven. They said come back when I'm 18.

Eighteen!  Not even Mr Woof's 18.  He's only 17, and that's so old he's no use for anything. He can't even catch a jingle ball.

It's all a humanist plot.  Most non-human species don't live much longer than 18 years, so the rules are made to keep non-humans out of politics.

I was getting bored with politics anyway.  I'm a superior animal, and shouldn't lower myself to behaving like a human.

So instead of being Prime Minispurr, I've decided to have a career as an olympic champion jingle ball chaser.  I trained for five whole minutes this morning. It's going to take me a couple of hours nap to recover from that.

I know many people will be disappointed at not being able to vote for a non-human party in this election, but don't fear.  I've heard the Greens have a Leadbeater's Possum running somewhere. (Or maybe he's just running their campaign for them, I'm not sure, but they talk about him a lot.) So on Saturday, you may not be able to vote Feline, but you can vote Possum.

Is 18 really old for a possum?  I don't know.  I should ask Honey, she's the Feline Pawty's expert on indigenous animals. I don't know what the possum's policies are, but he should be pro-animal.

If anyone wants me, I'll be with my jingle ball.

Until next time we meet in the Bloggosphere,
I remain,

Mr Bumpy,
Supreme Feline Overlord,
Australian Olympic Jingle Ball Team


  1. Oh Bumpy, so many hopes, so many efforts, and so little regard... I'm proud to have campaigned by your side. Best wishes for your new career. Loupi

  2. You can't run for Parliament? Why ever not? My pal Earl Grey is runnin' for Premier right now. Elections are on Tuesday!



Thanks for joining the conversation.

Your comment will be visible after moderation.