|3. If the cat wants the middle of the bed,|
the human must sleep on the edge.
- Provide fresh Friskies, stinky fish and water.
- Provide treats whenever the cat demands.
- If the cat wants the middle of the bed, the human must sleep on the edge.
- Never disturb a sleeping cat.
- If a cat puts his paws over his eyes, he's invisible. You can't see him, and you can't call him a "bad cat."
- You clean his litter tray. He doesn't clean your toilet. This tells you all you need to know about the cat-human relationship.
- A cat who wakes you up in the middle of the night because he wants attention, should be stroked, cuddled and showered in praise.
- Throwing a jingle ball for a cat to chase is a fulfilling and important use of a human's time.
- If the cat decides it is dinner time two hours before the normal dinner time - it's dinner time.
- When the cat wants brushies, it's non-negotiable.
- The dog is a sub-feline species. It should never be favoured above the cat.
- The human is a sub-feline species. It should always serve the cat's needs.
- Emptying the bin is the cat's right. The human is honoured to be allowed to clean up the mess.
- Humans who do not like cats are not to be invited to visit the cat's house.
The Obligations of Cats
- Do whatever you want.
- Do it wherever you want.
- Do it whenever you want.
- Do it for whatever reason you want.