Saturday, 29 November 2014

Scaredy Dog

Mum is sitting quietly on the lounge, playing games on the laptop computer.

She hears the animal door pushed open twice in quick succession.

Miss Fantasia taxis full speed down the hall, achieves take-off speed, clips the edge of the coffee table with her paws as she flies across it, touching and destabilizing (but not quite knocking over) the vase of roses.  Her paws skim the top of the empty side of the couch, then she crashes over the arm rest, sticking her paw in Mum's glass, and tumbling into Mum's lap.  Immediately, Fanta, jumps up, throws her front legs around Mum's neck with her rear end on top of Mum's hands and the laptop computer.

Mum: Wha???

Fanta: Mum! Mum! Save me!


Mr Bumpy, close behind Fanta, hurtles through the hall, leaps on the coffee table, and skids on the cloth. The vase of roses rocks ominously, but stays upright. Bumpy does a quadruple somersault, and lands, claws out millimetres short of Mum.

Mum: Bumpy! What did you do to Fanta?


Mr Bumpy regains he poise, and sits on the arm of the lounge in a dignified manner.


Mr Bumpy:  Me? I didn't do anything.


Mr Bumpy: That scaredy-dog is just running away from shadows. I'm completely innocent. And besides, you said she needed some exercise.

Fanta gets off the computer, and off Mum, and moves to the empty side of the lounge.  She lies looking guiltily at the roses, and doesn't say anything.


Mum: It's OK Fanta, it's not broken.

Mr Bumpy: You really shouldn't have got a dog, you know, especially not such a big scaredy-dog.

Tuesday, 25 November 2014

'Tis the Season to be Helpful

"I''m helping assemble a present
for baby Joey."
Hello out there in the Bloggosphere,

The summer heat has arrived, and that means Christmas is coming.

It's all busy, busy, busy here getting ready for Christmas.

I've been helping the family with Christmas presents and shopping.

Fanta's been flat out as well.

There's so much to do before Santa Claws comes to visit.

And, of course, I'm going to help everyone with everything, whether they want me to or not.  I know that sometimes means the humans think I'm in the way, but they'd mess everything up if I wasn't helping, I just know it.


"Fanta's flat out."

I hope Santa Claws will bring me more jingle balls and some Temptations treats for Christmas.

I have, after all, been a very good cat.

I've only attacked Fanta and the humans when they have deserved it.

Santa Claws should give me everything I want.  Otherwise, I'll probably scratch his face up.

Fanta wants squeaky toys.  Fanta has squeaky toys everywhere.

We are still talking about what we're giving the humans for Christmas. Fanta says they'd like squeaky toys as well.  I don't think so.

I think they're more likely to want cream, and fish.  Well, if I were a human that's what I would want.


Until next time we meet in the Bloggosphere,
I remain,


Mr Bumpy,
Bloggercat,
Supreme Feline Overlord.

Wednesday, 19 November 2014

Don't Have a Hot Dog

The best part is, I know I'm loved.
Hello Everyone!

I just love my new home and my new family.  It feels like I really belong here. The best part about it is that I know  I'm loved.

Even Mr Bumpy, my catty brother, who tries to act so tough, occasionally gives me a little smooch.

Of course, even being loved, I still have some disappointments.  My humans sometimes have to go out.  At those times, they leave me home.  It's late in spring here, and already it's getting really hot.  They leave me home so I can stay in the air conditioning, because it's too hot for dogs outside during the day. They give me interesting things to chew on while they're away, so I don't get anxious and chew things I shouldn't.

Do you know that some humans don't love their doggies as much as I'm loved?  Some humans take their dogs out and then leave them locked in the car. Those people deserve a good barking at, and even a bite.  Some big, brave, handsome, police dog, should come along and punish them. Doggies can get sick and even die if they're left in hot cars.  Humans who love their doggies should help them keep cool.

My humans are always concerned to keep me cool.  So, even though I'm disappointed that I don't get to go the places they're going, I know my humans do love me.  So I give them lots of cuddles and licks to show them that I understand.

The other disappointment now, is that with the warmer weather, fleas and ticks start to appear.  Because my humans love me, they don't want me to get fleas or, far worse, paralysis ticks. That means Mr Bumpy and I have to be sprayed with yukky smelly stuff every three weeks. The stuff is horrible, it's worse than a bath.  But I co-operate with it (the same as I co-operate with baths) because I know it means my humans love me a lot. They put yukky spray on me, but they do it so bad things won't happen to me.

So even the disappointments are really good after all, they're because my humans love me very, very much.

Lots of licks. Lots of tail wags. No barks (because polite little ladies don't do that).
Bye for now.
Miss Fantasia Dog
(but you can call me Fanta)